BITCHALKING™ is not exactly an attempt to reinvent a wheel. This is just a different view on old problem of pretty square "wheel of communications". Today, while having plenty communicative vehicles - e-mail, cellphones, verbal apparatus - we are not outspoken enough yet. It seems like every single one of these devices have some sort of disadvantage. Unlike cellphones, BITCHALKING™ doesn't need to be charged every day, you won't lose it in chaos of your room and it won't ever do that Beethoven's "Fur Elise" theme. It also doesn't need to be turned off in movie theater and you are never going to get cut by your spouse in a strip joint while supposedly attending one of those late-night "brainstorm meetings." Despite all of the above, you still can communicate "in" and "out" without signing for "family plan", if you know what I mean.

The problem I was trying to solve lays in a dark territory of relationships between men and women, such relationships that are "not going anywhere" and eventually end up with break-up. I know, that wasn't your fault, and now you are pissed-off as hell and want to communicate your condition to anyone who will listen. Stop right there! Nobody needs to listen to anything you are goint to say. Nobody isinterested. Everyone has his own bitches to deal with. Besides, that your whinging has no use for them/us. Cool off your jets, get some hardware ready and you may serve a big favor to the whole human's society by giving away some information about your ex. Yes, I know - you already told me, she was a bitch, so why should anybody else get screwed up at the same spot?

BITCHALKING™ offers a few ways to deal with this matter. Although all of them are pretty straightforward, there is still a way to play around with this tool, adding new elements and disguised meanings to already existed ones.


At all times people have been marking/chalking their territory according with their needs. Time ago it had form of pissing on the tree and doodling on the cave's walls. Later, when society developed enough to admit its need in courtesan and other sporting ladies, it became customary to paint such women's hair in certain colors, like white or red. Furthermore, after somebody had invented grapgic design you can't go anywhere without stumbling over all sorts of signs, marks and banners. Eventually this sign's craziness took it's toll on our sanity: seizure-inducing cocktail of trademarks and pictograms have made us numb to this sort of information. The last illusive bastion of privacy - our personal communicative devices - was conquered by SMS-spammers, downloadable ring tones and such. Where to go? How to know what is what and who is who?

There was a break-through though: Friendster. All what differentiate this service from dozens others that the only way to become a member was to get recommended by the person who already is a member. That's it: personal recomendation was enough to make this dating service huge success. Why? Honestly - I don't know. And right now it is not that important. The only interesting lesson we can get from this example is that if somebody tells us something in a form of recommendation - not advertisement, not preaching and without any monetary interest on their side - we will trust it more than anything. Same way, BITCHALKING™ based on brotherhood's decency and common sence.

There are a few predecessors of mine whose effort led to BITCHALKING™ one or another way.

HOBOCHALKING [more] - We may recycle some of the signs later for our purposes. Especially the "kind woman lives here. tell pitiful story" one.

WARCHALKING - Very smart way to communicate certain aspects of nerd's everyday life. Unfortunately, those of you who lives in not very developed areas (like, Mongolia or Zair) won't be able to use all advantages of this sort of communication.

WHORECHALKING - great potentials but wrong angle. I think nobody should pay for sex. Showing that you can't get laid for free you steal a credibility from your own marks. Also, whores may have kids and they want some candy, so don't steal whore's hard-earned buck.

PUBCHALKING - fun way to mark pubs that may be developed in more accurate way to rate restaurants than "three-thumbs-up" reviews by restaurant critics who got paid for each star.

PSYCHALKING - " Psychalking is a method for paranoids to communicate with each other about dangerous mind control hot spots. By leaving special symbols written in chalk on pavements, walls, slow-moving pedestrians, and other objects found around town, a paranoid can warn his or her peers of local mind control dangers and advise on a proper means of protection." I would like to contribute some psychalking symbols just to make their number bigger than "3" but I misplaced my AFDB so I can't think clear right now.

STREETWRITER - If you are really pissed off then you may choose to use The StreetWriter - is a modified cargo van, capable of printing messages on to the pavement while driving.

spit it out!

ATTENTION! To whom it may concern. No real bitchas had been harmed along working on this project, nor intentional damage of any kind had been inflicted on beforementioned subjects upon finishing.
Website owner, webmaster and editor do not responsible for any harassment, injury or other harmful event that occured to users and apologists of BITCHALKING™ doctrine before, during or after introducing to the doctrine, including their acquaintances, friends or relatives. Any and all accusations in contraversial consequences allegedly linked directly to the activity of this project will be dismissed as misleading and subjective and can be prosecuted by law.
All donations and revenue generated from this project will be used on whatever the owner of this project pleased to.
Although healthy portion of irony, parody and/or sarcasm, based on known entities, was interveined throughout some of designs, no infringement of any copyrights are intended. All images are property of their respective owners. You can demand removal of amy graphic material upon reasoning.
Author apologizes for all misspellings that may occur along this project - his motherland, planet Mars, had never been known for respect for barbarian languages.